How to Deal with an Annoying Bridesmaid

We've all seen it, time and time again. The bride who wants to scream because one of her bridesmaids is driving her insane. Bridesmaids are there to help the bride with whatever she need taken care of for the wedding. You usually only trust your closest friends and relatives with this task. But sometimes that friend or relative turns into your worst nightmare!

We shall start off with a little story. I was a bridesmaid for a good friend of mine. She calls me one day and starts ranting and raving about her maid of honor. My friend (the bride) needed her maid of honor's help, and not only was the maid of honor not helping, but she was pushing the subject of not WANTING to help. Does this sound familiar? Does it come close to what you or a friend are dealing with?

Now, the bigger issue is how (as the bride) do you deal with someone that you are so close to, and yet they are making your wedding process miserable for you. 

Step 1) Go over in your head which battles you want to fight and which to let go. Fighting with her over the type of candy that is at the candy bar at the reception is not as big as fighting with her to show up for the rehearsal. Yes, they can both be very important things to you, but would you rather blow up at her over the wrong color candy? 

Step 2) CALMLY tell her how you feel. I know this is easier said than done. But if you raise your voice and get harsh tones with her she will take to the defensive and then you are going to get nowhere. Speak to her clearly and don't back down if she tries to push. This is your wedding, not her's.

Step 3) If Step 2 has seemed to make the problem worse, or if you couldn't control the tension between you two, look at it at another angle. If you were in her shoes, would you think you have too much on your plate? Would you be uncomfortable doing the task she is asking of you? Remember they are there to help you, not SERVE you.

Step 4) If nothing is seeming to work, you may have to do what you have been not wanting to do at all. Cut her from the bridal party. You are already stressed enough with planning a wedding, do you really need her drama adding to it? I don't think so! It is hard to ask or tell someone that you don't want them in your wedding anymore but doing so, in the end, may make you both sign a breath of relief. 

Keep in mind, you are the bride not their boss. And ALWAYS think about the task you are asking of your bridesmaid before actually asking her. She may feel obligated to say yes, but it may not be something she is comfortable doing (like hiding your wedding dress in her closet. She doesn't want you mad at her if something happens to the dress).

So fellow brides, the moral of this story is before you assign a bridesmaid task, think like a bridesmaid and not the bride!

Good night and happy planning!